At What Age Can a Child Choose Who to Live With in Florida?

 

Can a Child Influence Custody Choices?

Any custody case involves some significant emotional challenges for everyone involved. While many parents aim for shared custody arrangements with fair parenting plans, this isn’t always possible. Alongside the various considerations for which party will have primary custody, one of the most common questions Florida parents ask is: at what age can a child choose who to live with?

Naturally, you want what’s best for your child and that includes taking their wishes seriously. Nevertheless, there are legal considerations that go into formalizing this arrangement. Not to mention that the matter of what is best for a child and what a child’s choice is don’t always necessarily mesh.

So, let’s take a look at how the Florida family law system treats this situation. What age can a child make a choice and what else is considered?

How Does Florida Law Handle Child Preferences?

From a strictly legislative perspective, the child’s preference is rarely if ever the only factor considered by the courts. Rather, the law requires that courts consider a range of elements, determining above all else which custodial arrangement is in the best interest of the child.

As outlined in Florida Statute §61.13:

“The court shall determine all matters relating to parenting and time-sharing of each minor child of the parties in accordance with the best interests of the child and in accordance with the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act…”

The same statute does formally acknowledge that the child’s preference can be taken into account, though.

“(i) The reasonable preference of the child, if the court deems the child to be of sufficient intelligence, understanding, and experience to express a preference.”

In either case, from a legal perspective, while a child’s preference can be taken into account, it is ultimately down to the courts to decide whether certain custody arrangements are in the child’s best interest.

When and How is Preference Considered?

Let’s break this down a little further on a practical level. The Florida Statutes we quoted basically mean that the courts are open to hearing the child’s opinion during a custody case. The important factor is whether the court also considers the child to be mature enough to make a rational and independent decision.

This is where an experienced Florida family law attorney can really help. They can help ascertain whether your child can represent themselves as an emotionally and intellectually developed individual to the extent that their choice will carry weight with the court.

There’s also some context the court is likely to look for when deciding how well-considered the child’s preference is, including:

Factor Context
Reason for preference Is the child making a mature choice based on emotional connection and a secure environment, or do they simply want to live with a parent that has fewer rules?
Level of understanding  Is it clear that the child understands the situation, alongside the practical and emotional consequences of their choice?
Potential influence Has the child made a genuine independent choice, or do they appear to have been influenced by the other parent – perhaps as part of malicious parent tactics?
Did You Know? Coercion is taken extremely seriously on the subject of children expressing custody preferences. If you suspect your child is being manipulated, speak to your attorney as soon as possible.
 

What Role Does Age Play?

Contrary to popular belief, in Florida there is no “magic age” at which a child suddenly becomes eligible to choose which parent they live with. Therefore, age on its own doesn’t hold much sway with the courts.

Nevertheless, the court is likely to take a child’s preference more seriously the more maturely they present themselves. Many kids start to show balanced reasoning in these types of issues from around the age of 12. Older teens, particularly once they reach the ages of between 14 and 17, tend to find their wishes hold more weight. This isn’t a guarantee, though, as children mature at different rates.

So, in the end, it’s not the number that makes a real difference; it’s the court’s perception of the child’s maturity based on how they present themselves and the reasoning behind the preference.

How Do Judges Receive Child Preferences?

Understandably, both parents and the Florida courts can be reluctant to put children under the stress or pressure of a formal hearing. Not to mention that it’s important to ensure that children’s statements aren’t unduly influenced by the presence of parents. Therefore, there’s a few other ways children can state their preferences without being on the witness stand.

  • Guardian ad Litem (GAL) – A neutral third-party may be appointed to make an assessment on the child’s living arrangements and report on their best interests. This GAL will usually privately interview the child and include their impressions on the child and their preferences in the report to the court.
  • Interview – Judges can speak to children directly in their chambers, rather than in the stressful surroundings of the court. This gives the judge a chance to make an assessment about the child’s maturity alongside hearing their preference first-hand.
  • Therapist or counselor – If the child is seeing a mental health professional, they might make a report that includes a note on the child’s preferences and whether this supports their psychological or emotional well-being.

Other Factors Considered

We’ve mentioned that age and maturity is just part of the equation. What else do courts take into account?
  • Emotional bond – The ongoing emotional connection between the child and each parent. The court will also consider each parent’s consistent presence in their child’s life.
  • Security – Each parent’s ability to provide a stable and loving environment.
  • Community connection – How custody will impact the child’s schooling, community interactions, and relationships with family or friends.
  • Abuse risks – Whether there’s evidence of physical or emotional violence, neglect, or substance abuse.
  • Coparenting commitment – Each parent’s willingness to encourage a relationship with the other parent and collaborate post-divorce.
  • Parental health – Physical and mental health of parents will be considered, assessing for any challenges or risks.

These are not the only factors the court will take into account, but they are among the most common.

Tip: While age on its own isn’t an influence, it’s helpful to show they’re mature enough to make choices. Consult your attorney about demonstrating previous examples of their mature decision-making.
 

Wrapping Up: Supporting Your Child’s Choice

In the end, it’s not your child’s age that determines who they live with. The outcome is always dependent on a number of elements that establish what is in the child’s best interest. Nevertheless, as a parent it is important to show your child that you respect their feelings and opinions. Committing to speaking to them about their needs, discussing any worries they have, and supporting them in at least expressing their preferences during custody hearings is all part of ensuring their best interests are met.

If you’re struggling with navigating this or any other part of the custody process, our experienced Florida family law attorneys are always available to provide guidance. We’ll help you to figure out your next steps toward making arrangements that are good for you and your child.

 

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