Newly Single for the Holidays?
If you are in the middle of a divorce or just recently got divorced, you may be dreading the holidays. But don’t give up on the dream that there is a perfect Christmas, Hanukkah, or Kwanzaa in your future! Yes, you may feel lonely, depressed, and “off-kilter” this season; however that is perfectly natural as divorce is really quite a life changing event. Combine that with the pressure that you are supposed to be acting “merry” or “joyous” and that can cause you even more anguish.
At In Law We Trust, P.A., we understand that everyone reacts to divorce differently, copes in different ways, and bounces back at different rates. For those of you that are going through divorce or spending their first season divorced, we’ve put together some ideas to not only help you get through the holidays, but to actually help you find and enjoy the Holiday Spirit!
Don’t Give in to the Urge to Spend the Holidays Alone
While it may be tempting to try and hibernate and avoid festivities all together- don’t do it! As hard as it may seem, push yourself to get out and spend time with others. Reach out to family and friends and if you need help to lift your spirits- don’t be afraid to ask for it. Now is a great time to catch up on quality time with your parents, siblings, nieces and nephews, extended family, and old friends. Spending time with your favorite people and even reaching out to make new friends will give you a different perspective of your first holidays as a “once again single” person.
Focus on What You Love About the Holidays
Think about whether it was your faith, the decorations, events, entertainment, gift giving, or parties that always brought you the most solace and happiness during the holidays. Then go ahead and immerse yourself in those activities that make you feel good. If you have fewer funds available for gift giving this year, take the time to prepare a budget and do price comparisons when shopping. Also, remember that gifts don’t always need to be material items. Sometimes the gift of time and attention, as well as sharing your talents, will mean the most to the recipient. If you are fortunate enough to have a little extra money around the holidays, why not add yourself to your gift giving list? With your ex-spouse off your list, you might be able to treat yourself to something you’ve always wanted!
Start New Traditions
Some of your former traditions may not be feasible when you are divorcing or divorced, but there is always a way to simplify, modify, or even enhance those traditions now that you have more freedom. Even if you used to travel during the holidays and won’t be doing that this year, there are plenty of new destinations to discover or even day trips to enjoy. Be creative and start new traditions that you will love. Don’t get caught up in the negative aspects of what is different this year, instead think about what is different and positive this season!
Focus on Others and the Good Things in Your Own Life
Put your energy into charities and working with those less fortunate than you. This may be a time in your life when you feel like you are the “unfortunate one,” but when you spread kindness to others it will be easier to forget about your own troubles and appreciate what you do have! Count your blessings and cultivate an inner feeling of gratitude. Adopting this attitude will carry you in a positive direction year-round!
You Deserve to Be Happy!
As hard as it may seem at first, make the effort to enjoy the holidays! You deserve to be happy and remember to stay confident that very soon life will get better!
Call The Family Law Experts Men Trust (813) 415-3510
In Law We Trust, P.A. is a premier firm of divorce lawyers representing men in family law proceedings. We are uniquely positioned to assist our clients with the challenges men face in Florida’s court system. Call us today and get the proper representation men need and deserve.